I used to hate the color pink. I hated girly stuff like flowers and dresses. I didn't play with Barbies, I played with G.I. Joes.
Whenever I would see girly girls or feminine stuff as a teenager, I would get annoyed. I would remember how my mother would put me in these fancy dresses and yell at me for acting like such a tomboy. My mother and I never really got along, and once I hit my teens, we barely spoke.
When I entered my late teen and early twenties, I found myself drawn to feminine things. But for some time I withheld myself from putting on makeup, wearing jewelry, dresses, high heels...I would feel the similar sense of annoyance rise up in me.
I would think of how my mother always wore all this pink and feminine stuff, and how she was never supportive of me or kind to me. She was very selfish and all about her. So I associated pink and the feminine with her negative traits. And I realized that was where my bias came from.
I started to examine the fancy dresses at Macys. A really sweet young saleswoman helped me pick out a dress. She was shy and a bit quiet, just like me. And I started to think to myself,"There is surely nothing wrong with the color pink, and dressing girly and wearing all these lovely makeups and perfumes. Just because my mother wore these things doesn't mean they are bad!"
Then I walked by the ice cream store in my new dress(I went and put it on right after I bought it, lol), and I saw all these different people eating ice cream. And I thought,"Everyone likes ice cream because it tastes good! Everyone is attracted to things that make them feel good. And women like to dress feminine and wear pink because it also makes them feel good! There is nothing wrong with me wearing a dress and behaving like a lady!"
I started to have more compassion for my mom. It was true that she had a very hard life. Wearing pinks probably made her feel better. I realized that she too was just trying to feel good about herself, about life. And I thought to myself that it was nice she always tried to get me to act like a lady, to dress nice, because even though it was partly for her own image it was also because she cared.
And so my favorite color is pink now. I learned to love it. And I wear lots of girly dresses because I love them. And sometimes I dress down and wear my tomboy clothes, my chuck taylors and my jeans. But I don't let any bad experiences I've had get in the way of something good.
If it makes you feel good and is in your best interests, which is usually in the best interests of others as well, then it is good. Don't let any biases get in the way of your life. All beings are attracted toward that which is good. Sometimes they get side tracked from the pink dresses and wear tomboy clothes, but if you give them a little room to breath you'll find them checking out the dresses.
And if you see something you like but feel that you can't have because of something that happened in the past, that created a bias in you, ask if it is in your best interest. And if you'll just play around a little bit, you'll find that your biases will lift and you will experience life all the more richly. Because it is your own being, your inner truth, that lights up around good things. All beings deserve good things, to feel the caress of the sunshine, to feel the wind in their hair, to smell the flowers, to experience the touch of another. Let nothing distract you from your God given right to be, and to feel, and experience the physical domain on planet Earth.
Whenever I would see girly girls or feminine stuff as a teenager, I would get annoyed. I would remember how my mother would put me in these fancy dresses and yell at me for acting like such a tomboy. My mother and I never really got along, and once I hit my teens, we barely spoke.
When I entered my late teen and early twenties, I found myself drawn to feminine things. But for some time I withheld myself from putting on makeup, wearing jewelry, dresses, high heels...I would feel the similar sense of annoyance rise up in me.
I would think of how my mother always wore all this pink and feminine stuff, and how she was never supportive of me or kind to me. She was very selfish and all about her. So I associated pink and the feminine with her negative traits. And I realized that was where my bias came from.
I started to examine the fancy dresses at Macys. A really sweet young saleswoman helped me pick out a dress. She was shy and a bit quiet, just like me. And I started to think to myself,"There is surely nothing wrong with the color pink, and dressing girly and wearing all these lovely makeups and perfumes. Just because my mother wore these things doesn't mean they are bad!"
Then I walked by the ice cream store in my new dress(I went and put it on right after I bought it, lol), and I saw all these different people eating ice cream. And I thought,"Everyone likes ice cream because it tastes good! Everyone is attracted to things that make them feel good. And women like to dress feminine and wear pink because it also makes them feel good! There is nothing wrong with me wearing a dress and behaving like a lady!"
I started to have more compassion for my mom. It was true that she had a very hard life. Wearing pinks probably made her feel better. I realized that she too was just trying to feel good about herself, about life. And I thought to myself that it was nice she always tried to get me to act like a lady, to dress nice, because even though it was partly for her own image it was also because she cared.
And so my favorite color is pink now. I learned to love it. And I wear lots of girly dresses because I love them. And sometimes I dress down and wear my tomboy clothes, my chuck taylors and my jeans. But I don't let any bad experiences I've had get in the way of something good.
If it makes you feel good and is in your best interests, which is usually in the best interests of others as well, then it is good. Don't let any biases get in the way of your life. All beings are attracted toward that which is good. Sometimes they get side tracked from the pink dresses and wear tomboy clothes, but if you give them a little room to breath you'll find them checking out the dresses.
And if you see something you like but feel that you can't have because of something that happened in the past, that created a bias in you, ask if it is in your best interest. And if you'll just play around a little bit, you'll find that your biases will lift and you will experience life all the more richly. Because it is your own being, your inner truth, that lights up around good things. All beings deserve good things, to feel the caress of the sunshine, to feel the wind in their hair, to smell the flowers, to experience the touch of another. Let nothing distract you from your God given right to be, and to feel, and experience the physical domain on planet Earth.