First, as we know, when car shopping we should determine what we need, not what we want. A giant gas guzzler is not right for someone with a long commute. A two seat sports car is wrong for someone with small children. With this in mind, we generally forget that this same rule applies to dating. Simply put, we are happiest when we are with a partner that meets our needs, not our wants. Just like choosing the wrong car, choosing the wrong partner is a decision that will bring quick regret. Wealth and beauty are, of course, qualities that we all want in a partner, but what good is a beautiful woman if she is not loving and supportive? What good is a wealthy man if he is rude or non-committal?
When we choose a car, we all know that we should first ensure that it is mechanically sound. Nobody would purchase a car with a bad engine or a faulty transmission. If the car will not run It does not matter how good the radio is, or how comfortable the seats are. When looking for a partner the smart move is to apply the very same logic. Potential partners should first meet the fundamental needs of a relationship. They must be truly single without complications. They must be looking for true committed partnership. They must display emotional maturity and a good work ethic. It is only after these qualities are confirmed that we should consider other factors like compatibility and attraction. Nobody is saying that attraction and compatibility are not important. Rather, they are not worth considering if the person does not first meet the fundamentals. Dating a married man is like buying a car with a bad engine. Dating a spoiled, immature woman is like overlooking a bad transmission.
Finally, when shopping for a car we should never feel pressured to act fast. The world is not running out of cars. It is also not running out of people. The best move is to take our time, and not be stressed. When car is not right, do not buy it. Recognize that the right one will appear, it will just take a bit more work. The same is true with dating. The process may not be fun, but if we waste our time with the wrong person we will not find the right person. Move on, shop around, and only act on your terms.
Admittedly, comparing people to cars may sound unromantic, but the best partner is someone that meets our needs. Thus, the best decisions are the smart decisions that weigh the elements that matter most. When we do it properly we end up with exactly what works best.
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