- Fear of being alone...hold on to a past love and you are never alone
- Fear of the unknown...hold on to an unhealthy relationship and you know what you have -- it is a known entity -- perhaps the lesser of two evils but you will never know
- Fear of rejection...hold on to what you have out of safe habit and if you truly put yourself out there you may not be wanted
- Fear of failing....hold on to status quo and you can not fail again
- Fear of trying something new...hold on to your comfort zone and not face not fitting in or feeling awkward
- Fear of change...hold on to what you are used to and never face discomfort
- Fear of new ideas..hold on to set belief systems and avoid taking true stock of your existence
- Fear of meeting new people...hold on to your familiar circle and no one new will judge you
- Fear of speaking your mind...hold on to your ideas and concerns and no one will challenge you
These fears are universal to most of not all human beings. Human beings hate change even if we hate our current circumstances. We are creatures of habit. We like to stay put! Unless we have lots of gypsy blood in us we will stay with situations and places for years. To make maters more interesting about this phenomenon is we KNOW we are doing it. We bitch and moan to anyone who will listen as to how much we are -- UNHAPPY...MISERABLE...and most amazing of all WANT Change...unbelievable right? Happens everyday to all of us....GOOD NEWS is we can change but first we must be willing to leave what we don't love.
The only reason we should be:
- In a profession
- In a particular job
- In a relationship of any kind
- In a dwelling
- In a city or state or country
- In a state of mind
IS BECAUSE WE LOVE IT! What I am completely, absolutely, positively, without a shadow of a doubt sure of ???......If you don't love it then leave it! Granted--easier said than done.. BUT you can if you really want to....What prevents you from being happy is FEAR-GUILT-OBLIGATION ... People leave relationships everyday...there are alot of rich divorce attorneys! People leave their jobs everyday...tons of wealthy employment agencies and headhunters! People move out of their dwellings and change their zip-codes..there are countless lucrative realtors and moving van companies! The people who chose to change their circumstances were motivated by many reasons but I am willing to bet the farm that the most motivating of motivators is being unhappy! Change is not easy...change is draining..change has a heavy emotional and financial cost --at times--BUT whatever the cost in the end it is worth.
Have you ever asked someone who made a change in the direction of following their heart it they were sorry they made the change...You probably did not have to ask because you could see and feel how happy the person is now. I bet you if you asked them is they were scared at first they would not hesitate and say.."Hell yeah!" But then they would say best damn decision I ever made. Do not get me wrong I am not saying drop all your responsibilities and run away ...that happens to often today. What I am saying is if you are NOT happy because you do not love your life..I am saying change it. Not overnight but with a plan...Try doing this exercise step by step:
- Examine and Evaluate your life
- List what you love
- List what you do not like
- List what you hate
- Create a wish list of what you would love in your life and where you would love to do it as if you lived in a perfect world
- ABOLISH ALL FEAR, GUILT and OBLIGATION..even for a moment to do the exercise
- Keep and be grateful for what you love
- Create an alternate to what you hate abased on what you love
- Be willing to make changes!
- NEVER say -- CAN'T!
Leave what does not work, leave what does not feel right, leave what is forced, leave what is causing pain....LEAVE what does not make you happy! BUT you must realize the golden rule....People, places and things do NOT make you happy!!!!!! You make you happy BUT if you remove everything that you KNOW does NOT make you Happy .. you then can think and reason more clearly as to who and what you want to be and where you want to do it. Ain't easy but so very worth it.
Get rid of the reasons you have created for staying:
- The kids...you are messing them up not helping them
- Too expensive...happy people make money
- No other jobs available... don't quit till you find another one
- Don't want to be alone...millions of people around you BUT happy and alone is better then miserable with a warm body
- Can't sell your house...manifest a buyer or break even or rent it
The only reason for leaving is I deserve better and my happiness AND the happiness for the people I care about is worth it! This blog may sound irresponsible or selfish BUT what is the alternative..miserable people making other people miserable ????? Think about it if you are not happy no one around you or the people you care about are happy...pleeeeessse do not kid yourself you ain't hiding your unhappiness...everyone knows..trust me! So when you decide you are ready to make positive changes and find the inner strength (which does exist inside us all) to leave what is sad, broken and painful behind or JUST plain boring, annoying or unpleasant..just make a plan and DO IT! Life is too short and were designed to be happy if weren't we would not fuss over being unhappy! Want help with your changes call me and together my guides will help you design a plan. God Bless Love Kat