What does the term "soul-mate" mean? In my line of work I often hear this term and at times it can cause quite a bit of controversy. In a world filled with Hollywood interpretation of love and relationships it can sometimes be quite difficult educating others on what a "soul-mate" is. I hope in this blog to educate as well as clarify what this term means, what the relationships they denote can be like and what they are not.
My response to the question "Where is my soul-mate" typically is "which one?".
The reason for this is that while we are typically lead to believe that there is only one this is simply not the case. Nor are these connections strictly romantic. Ive had three soul mates enter my life, my sister, my best friend and my husband. Does this confuse you given the typically assumed definition of the term?
Well lets start then by first clarifying what the term implies. A soul-mate is someone with whom you have karmic energy and lessons with. Your best friend, your sister, your aunt, your lover (past and present) even your next door neighbor could be one of many of your soul-mates. These are connections that are "meant" to be in your life. There are lessons to learn and karmic energy to resolve. These lessons and energies could be new and exclusive to this life or could have roots in previous lives you have shared with these people. Either way what these connections imply is that you and this person have work to do through your interactions together.
Sometimes these lessons/energies take years, entire lifetimes to be resolved...and sometimes several lifetimes. If you resolve the energy and lesson in this lifetime sometimes the relationship continues, and sometimes it does not. This accounts for some of our more profound heartaches, where someone who felt an incredible connection with, a "soul" connection with leaves us or chooses to end the relationship.
What these relationships are not are "easy" or "forever". As described above sometimes once the energy is resolved and the lessons learned the relationship will fade away. Sometimes we resist that ending but that doesnt negate that some of these connections are meant to end. Nor are these connections "walks in the park". If anything these relationships can be fraught with obstacles, pitfalls and ups and downs as they are deeper than just your surface level connection.
Many of my clients sometimes laugh when I begin to disperse the misconceptions regarding this term. Usually its not because they dont get it because once explained most seem to feel the resonance and the light bulb goes off but because I am so passionate about explaining this. I believe that the Hollywood Rom-Com perpetuated definition is not only extremely inaccurate but also extremely challenging to live up to.
When we walk through with the notion that there is only "one" out there who is going to "complete" us we tend to miss out on a great many experiences which will offer up much happiness and positivity. We also tend to fail to realize that we are the only ones who can complete ourselves. We are not a half done puzzle waiting for the other portion to join us. Relationships with others are meant to be an addition to a wonderfully full and complete life, not what makes it so.
I believe that when the true meaning of this term and its implication upon our lives we can begin to complete ourselves and work towards understanding our relationships, romantic, platonic and familial alike, so that we can learn to appreciate them and embrace their impact upon our lives.
I hope that everyone has a wonderful weekend. I wish you all prosperity, success and health!
Blessed BE!