“It’s not right for you”
“How do you know this?”
“I can’t explain it, I just know.”
“Well, TRY to at least give your thoughts on it!”
Ok. It’s like this:
When a person has not been in a relationship for a long time, and meets someone that they find a few commonalities with, mainly physical and some intellectual compatibility, that person is more inclined to CREATE a relationship based on these breadcrumbs. Instead of waiting for someone to knock their socks off, it’s a transition of “this feels good to have someone to care about me in my life again.” Thus the “created” relationship begins.
Suddenly your life becomes exciting and there’s someone to share it with! Because we are social animals, we all want to share special moments with someone that we make special to us. The operative word here is MAKE special. Our minds are powerful. We have the ability to make a daisy look like a beautiful orchid.
The problem with created relationships is that sooner or later, the reality of what it IS will become very apparent. What little tid bits of commonalities will become mundane. Whatever spark in the beginning of it (“wow- someone actually likes me!”) will wear thin. Created relationships are ones built on sand, and sink slowly… think of it to be something like infatuation – an emotional feeling often mistaken for love.
Created relationships often move at the speed of light. Why? Because you are both so starved for someone special, that the relationship gets way ahead of where you actually may BE in terms of TRUE FEELINGS. It’s slightly similar to being desperate to wanting a life back. For many, being alone is extremely difficult. Oh, sure, you can manage, but it’s so much more fun to manage as a couple. And, face it – our society is built on couples.
Here’s some more food for thought: while you’re busy burning daylight on a relationship that will only move forward if pushed, and pushed hard that eventually it becomes more difficult to create the feelings; developing into more of a mundane existence. I call it mediocre. And, at this point, you may wonder why you ever settled for mediocre when fabulous was perhaps just around the corner?
Good things DO come to those who wait. Take your life one day at a time. It’s precious, and much too precious to live it creating something to live instead of living with something great.